When COVID-19 appeared in the spring of 2020, many people hoped it would be over in a few months. Few relished the idea of shutting themselves up into apartments and putting their social lives on the back burner. Yet, the hope that things would soon be back to normal initially made it easier to endure the loneliness that quickly set it during the pandemic.

It’s been nearly a year since the first wave of lockdowns. Many people who initially thought their social needs could be ignored for the pandemic’s duration are tired of waiting. While they recognize COVID-19 as a tangible threat to their physical health, they know that the psychological threats of depression and loneliness are just as real.

It’s hard to say when we as a society may be able to return to normal. You’ve probably heard news anchors’ reports that the vaccine is less effective against new strains and virologists’ recommendations to continue social distancing post-vaccination. As such, it may seem like there’s no practical way to overcome isolation during the pandemic, but that isn’t entirely true. There’s no replacement for physical closeness, but there are still ways to meet new people and lessen loneliness during the pandemic.

How to socialize and meet people in a pandemic

One of the easiest ways you can decrease loneliness during this pandemic is to take advantage of the connections you already have. If you haven’t reached out to friends or family lately, now is a great time. If possible, don’t connect via text or phone every time; incorporate a video session now and then. Many of us have major Zoom fatigue right now, but locking eyes on people we are securely connected with can help us feel less isolated.

Another way to cope with social isolation during COVID-19 is to take part in any of the myriad online activities that are going on right now. Classes and meet-ups that used to require a cab across town are now available from the comfort of your living room. Many have a social component in the form of social media groups and video discussion sessions, so it’s potentially a good way to meet people who share your interests. Besides the social benefits, pursuing a hobby or educational goal is also an excellent solution for those of you wondering how to spend free time productively during the pandemic.

While our next suggestion wouldn’t be as fun as, say, taking an online sommelier class, joining an online therapy group would be another effective way to create new connections right now. In addition to the loneliness you’re facing, perhaps you’re also dealing with depression, anxiety, addiction, or some other mental health concern. An online therapy group can provide a venue for venting your frustrations and connect you with peers who understand what you’re going through.

How to cope with feeling alone

We’re not going to pretend that the suggestions offered above are a panacea for overcoming loneliness. While meeting with people virtually can be extremely helpful, there’s nothing quite like physical companionship and closeness. No matter how often you Facetime with mom or interact with people you meet online, you will likely still experience loneliness during the pandemic, especially if you’re living alone.

One perfectly reasonable strategy for overcoming loneliness would be to distract yourself. Dwelling on your situation is probably not making you feel any better, so why not focus your attention elsewhere? Brush up on last week’s Mandarin lesson to prepare for your next class. Read a book. Watch an episode of a funny sitcom. Try your hand at watercolor painting or jump into some other activity you’ve been curious about—anything to prevent your mind from dwelling on how alone you are.

Well, maybe not anything. I’m not recommending you use your online sommelier class as an excuse to down four bottles of wine in an evening. If you’re indulging in self-destructive behaviors, we implore you to find a healthier way to divert yourself. We also urge anyone who is using work as a distraction to proceed with caution. Your boss probably loves it, but failing to maintain boundaries between your professional and personal life is not a healthy long-term strategy.

Here’s another potential downside of using distractions to cope with loneliness: they don’t address the underlying problem. Typically, it isn’t just the physical circumstance of being alone that creates depression and anxiety—painful thought loops also play a role. If you tend to ruminate about your solitary situation, take a look at the thoughts and feelings that often come up for you. Why is being alone so intolerable for you? Is it because you’re afraid of being single forever? Or because your self-esteem tanks when you don’t have social validation?

Questions like these can help you understand yourself better and provide opportunities for self-improvement. Asking hard questions won’t be easy, but it can ultimately help you develop a higher tolerance for lonely feelings. This challenging but essential work can even teach you how to be happy alone, a useful skill for both singles and those already partnered up.

Loneliness can be a painful experience; there’s nothing wrong with getting some support to help you through it. Our team of therapists can teach you how to cope with feeling alone without resorting to self-destructive habits. We can also help you figure out how to meet people—even in a pandemic. Visit our relationship therapy page for more information or request an appointment for a free, 20-minute phone consultation.